Garbage In, Garbage Out

When I think about mental health, I often, if not always, compare it directly to physical health. How we take care of our bodies should be a leading indicator of how we feel mentally.

Consider some of the worlds highest performing athletes: what do you think they put in their bodies?

World class athletes consistently consume high quality macro and micro nutrients. Foods that are nutritionally rich and hydrating with vitamins, minerals, essential amino acids, and healthy fats, to ensure that their bodies predictably operate at peak performance. These individuals who are eating better will inevitably jump higher, skate faster, lift more weight, and recover more quickly from rigorous training than their competitors.

High Performing Athletes

This level of vigilance about consuming only the highest quality nutrients and avoiding tempting junk food, while difficult, is one of their greatest advantages.

I strongly believe that there’s so much that we can learn from how athletes, and healthy eaters, treat their bodies that will impact the way that we focus on our own mental health.

But first, imagine the opposite of the athlete and healthy eater, Jack the Junk food addict.

Jack doesn’t pay too much attention to what he puts into his body. He lacks discipline and as a result he caves frequently into his cravings. Because he eats so much fast food, he’s constantly consuming refined sugars, unhealthy trans and saturated fats, high sodium foods, and processed – low nutritional value, empty calorie – junk!

Junk food image

But wait… We can’t forget the sugar loaded sodas and juice concentrates he grew up loving, too! And with all of that, it still remains a mystery to Jack as to why he has low energy. Why he always wakes up feeling groggy, sluggish and mentally foggy. Why every day he has to rely on coffee and stimulants just to make it through his work day. Why he’s lost his zest for life.

Let’s help remove the blinders of the oh-so obvious mystery perplexing Jack and junk food eaters alike.

Garbage in, garbage out. 

How could we expect anything other than to feel like garbage if the only thing we put in our body is garbage!

We can’t.

And if what we put in our bodies unequivocally impacts our physical performance, how could we ignore that what we put in our minds, our thoughts, and our beliefs about ourself and our circumstances, will also clearly effect our mental health and performance.

We can’t.

There are multiple pillars that drive a healthy mind, but I fundamentally believe one of the most powerful and reliable is focusing on a consistently healthy diet of external inputs into our minds. In almost identical fashion to our physical health, we either set ourselves up for resilience, health, and joy, or anxiety, stress, and unhappiness based on our chosen mental diets.

Here is our greatest challenge to ensuring a proper mental diet.

Our biggest challenge is that controlling what our brain consumes is especially difficult. On a day to day basis, so much of what we take in is unconscious. Although it’s true that we can eat without thinking, it’s easier to pay attention to what we put in our bodies because food doesn’t leap into our mouths!

We need an extra level of vigilance to prevent our brains from absorbing irrelevant, counterproductive or downright destructive input. It’s a never-ending battle to be selective and stand guard against any information that will derail your mental health.

To understand this challenge at our cores, the only thing we need to remember is that the brain has only one agenda: survival. It’s always watching for signs of “lack and attack.” We’re programmed to seek out the negative from our jobs, studies and our lives.

Unfortunately we can’t change our DNA, but we can change our behaviour. We can teach our mind to look beyond the negative by protecting and feeding it positivity.

Now, please enjoy  2 focuses and 6 actionable take-aways that you can apply, today.


“Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.” – Amy Poehler

I’ll start with your associations because I believe it is the simplest and quickest thing you can change to make an impact on your mental health.

Over the past decade, researchers have made fascinating discoveries about a phenomenon called “clustering”. They found that behaviours, attitudes, and health outcomes tend to form in social clusters. The people around you even even affect how you sleep, the food that you eat, and how much you save. This of course, can have both positive and negative repercussions.

On the negative front, bad behaviours and outcomes such as smoking, obesity, loneliness, depression, divorce, and drug use tend to grow in social clusters. If your friends smoke, you probably will, too. Likewise, positive things such as happiness and positive social behaviour can spread within groups. If you want to get rich, you should spend more time with rich people. If you want to lose weight, it’s practical to hangout with people who spend a lot of time at the gym. Social contagion, as the researchers call it, is a powerful force that you can now use to your advantage. Use these tips to level up your squad and make a positive impact on your mental diet.

  1. Play Sports- Join that intramural league. Visit that ping pong group. Get that golf membership. By putting yourself in a competitive position, especially in team sports, not only will you learn more about yourself, but you’ll have the opportunity to connect and be vulnerable with new people. Competition is one of those unique scenarios we don’t get enough in life. It makes you elevate your game, prepare and work harder, and interact with people who’re doing the same.
  2. Volunteer- This should be your first move if you’re someone who feels like you’re surrounded by negative influences. Volunteers by nature are spirited, positive people. They are givers. People that are generous enough to put others before themselves are the type of people we should strive to spend more time with. When you meet people who are trying to make a big difference in the world, it makes a big difference in yours.
  3. You don’t need to drop all of your negative friends – Not only is the conflict associated with burning bridges not worth it and disempowering for both parties, there are many more appropriate ways to better your associations. Instead of focusing on spending less time with negative people, simply decide today that you will spend more time with positive people. By proxy, you will have less time for negative associations and you’re much more likely to maintain that relationship. Think add, not subtract.

Imagine how much better your life would be if you got better people into your social network. Choose to surround yourself with the people who have the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviours in congruency with the person you’re committed to becoming.

Personal Junk Filter

“The book you don’t read won’t help.” – Jim Rohn

The junk food equivalent today for what we put into our minds sounds like this: negative news, unrealistic body images on Instagram, and fake entrepreneurs on social media flashing fancy watches, cars, and beautiful women. Where the news equals a can of Coca Cola, Instagram equals those fried funnel cakes people love, and fake entrepreneurs selling $30,000 mastermind courses equals a Big Mac.

Exposed to all of this garbage, we can’t realistically expect to constantly feel positive emotions and thought patterns about ourselves and the world. It’s all too negative or revolves around what we’re missing. How much better life could be, not how good it is. Just like the body needs quality nutrition in order to sustain your positive mental health long-term, you need to focus on quality inputs that will lead you in the right direction.

I’ll share with you what I do to safeguard my mind. But I warn you, I have a rigorous mental diet. You’ll want to adjust this to your own preferences, but it’s worked beautifully for me over the last 4 years.

  1. Avoid the news– As you may have guessed, I don’t read or watch any news whatsoever. Not only is 90% of news the most scandalous, negative, and disturbing things that are taking place in the world right now, virtually none of it has any bearing on my personal goals, dreams, and ambitions anyways. While most people wade through hours of irrelevant garbage that hampers their attitude and dampers their spirits, if you really need the news, set up an RSS feed through Google or another provider. That way you will get the news that’s relevant to your primary field of interest in less than 15 minutes a day.
  2. Enroll in “Commuters U”– It’s not enough to eliminate negative inputs. We also need to flush out all the bad by filling up on all the good. “Commuters U” may have been one of the most transformational habits I’ve ever adopted. It stands for Commuters University and means that any time you’re moving – whether it’s going for a walk, riding your bike, or driving/ taking transit – you pull out a book, podcast, or some educational tool, and start learning. Think about it… How long is your commute? 10 minutes? 30 minutes? 1 hour? Regardless of how long, the time we spend commuting every day is a prime opportunity to fill ourselves up with quality mental nutrition. Over the last year I’ve developed new skills in sales, leadership, relationship building, and maintaining a positive attitude in tough times, all because I took advantage of Commuters U. You should taste multiple different influencers and see what you like but here’s a short list of some of my go-to’s: Jim Rohn, Les Brown, Gary Vaynerchuck, Tim Ferris, Jocko Willink, Tony Robbins, Napolean Hill, and many more!
  3. Remember the three action items from associations– As we’re now well aware, one of the easiest and most effective ways to adopt new behaviours and attitudes is to hang out with the people who already have them. Therefore, if you want to develop a better junk filter and protect your mind from the garbage that’s constantly pulling at your attention, remember the three action steps from associations; play sports, volunteer, and think add not subtract. If your peer group spends less time watching the news, you will too. If they subscribe to Commuters U and focus only on positive, educational, and uplifting inputs, so will you!

Do this. 

That is a lot of information to chew on… See what I did there? But information is not enough to impact your mental diet and as a result, your mental health. You can however, make the choice, no matter how challenging and dire your circumstances look, to take one step in a positive direction, today.

Choose 1, yes, only 1, of the 6 takeaways above and apply it today. Whether you start volunteering, avoid the news, or pick up a new book for your commute tomorrow, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you make the decision to do 1. 1 will lead to another, and soon, your mental diet will be just as clean in comparison to the foods Olympians eat.

Make your mental diet a priority right now! Because after all, garbage in, is garbage out.

Ps. If supporting mental health is important to you, I’m currently raising money for Canada’s largest youth led summit on mental health. We need your support! Please donate here or share this link with someone that would like to support mental health in Canada. 

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change the destination of your life overnight but you can change the direction”



Some Practical Thoughts On Mental Health

Fall of 2016, I’m working as full-time employee in sales and part time as an entrepreneur. Naturally, as a salesman and speaker, my voice became my livelihood. Fortunately for me, I started to get the hang of it! At work, I was making a significant contribution to my team. As a speaker, I was being recognized as one of Toronto’s up-and-coming talents. Unfortunately, however, any threat to your livelihood, can be debilitating. And for me, the threat was real.

In October of 2016, I developed severe pain in my throat. Not being one to complain, I worked through an entire week of sales paying the throbbing in my throat little attention.

Huge mistake.

I woke up Saturday morning, my throat was raw and my voice, gone. Now this wouldn’t have been a problem at all if I was sick! But I wasn’t. I felt normal, except an excruciating pain whenever I spoke.

Days went by, nothing changed. I called in sick to work, my recovery didn’t progress. Finally, I’m sitting in the emergency room at Sunnybrook hospital. The doctor walks and checks my paperwork.

“Your throat?”

I nodded yes.

“Does it hurt?”

I nodded as a tear rolled down my cheek.

“Okay, let’s take a look.”

As the doctor walked away to get the long tube she would soon be pushing up my nose and down my throat, the tears flowed. I couldn’t control myself. All of the hard work that I’d been putting in to progress as a speaker, all of the hours I had been rehearsing, the career that I was building and the dreams I was dreaming, was it all for nothing?

I was devastated.

I felt defeated and wondered if I was going down the wrong path. I asked myself all the questions we ask ourselves when hit with obstacles… Is this even worth it? Was I making a difference? Why me?

Just when I felt that I had found my calling, my voice abandoned me…

The diagnosis was simple, I had extreme inflammation and irritation in my throat. The doctors order was a minimum of a week with no speaking, although it should be closer to 2-3. The following months felt like high school all over again. I felt the cloud of negativity slowly moving in and weighing down on me. One of my greatest assets was at risk. Moreover, some of the simplest of tasks, those we take for granted everyday, became a chore. I no longer wanted to talk to my parents or girlfriend and I started hating my job.

My focus shifted from my goals, dreams, and hopes only a few weeks prior, to everything that was wrong, unfair, and challenging about my life. I felt depressed, but this time, I knew how to handle it. 

Even though It’s been over a year since my throat injury and I still experience irritation every time I speak, I credit the successful rebound of my mental health, from Crisis mode to healthy, because of the lessons I’ve learn in the last four years living depression free. With that, I want to share some practical thoughts on mental health. It may not be the most popular, but it’s effective, and I’d like you to consider sharing this with someone who may need it.

Mental health, like physical health, has a spectrum 

Personally, my first step to identifying whether or not I, or someone I know, needs support and it’s urgency is to see where we fall on this spectrum. As much as it would be nice to think that everyone could be healthy all the time, it’s important to consider that stress does not discriminate. Regardless of your background, gender, ethnicity, or socio-economic conditions, everyone experiences stress, and therefore it would be naive to believe that you or I, would never have challenges with our mental health.

Mental Health Spectrum.png

This is where it’s practical to distinguish the difference between mental illness and mental health. Does everyone have a mental illness? No. Does everyone have mental health? Yes.

Where you, your friends, or family, are currently positioned on this spectrum depends on the stress (not all is created equal), the duration of those stressors, and the strategies you’re using to cope and what you choose to focus on. For example, small stressors, that happen over a week, tackled with the right strategies, will result in your ability to remain within yellow if not green. Comparatively, overwhelming stressors, over a long period of time, left unchecked without the proper strategies will have you struggling if not experiencing a crisis.

I’d like to challenge you to do an inventory of where you’re currently positioned on the spectrum. Our minds, emotions, and behaviours vary over time and even though you were feeling great yesterday doesn’t guarantee exuberant happiness next week. Use this spectrum as a tool. Check in with yourself frequently, as I do, to measure every few weeks or months (at the least) how you’re feeling and if there is any need to reach out for help.

The law of impermanence

Although I still feel irritation in my throat when I speak, it’s nothing compared to the original pain I experienced in October of 2016. As I began to cope with the idea of speaking through pain and what an incredible injustice I’d received, I took a tip right out of the Buddhist playbook.

Buddhist philosophy states,

“Fluctuations are an inherent fabric of life. Because nothing is permanent, attachment to the ups leads to inevitable suffering. Conversely, aversion to the downs is illogical because those too shall pass.”

Given the practical nature of this post, it’s only too fitting to realize that it would have been illogical for me to expect that the excruciating pain would last forever. Life, like nature, is cyclical. After day we get night. After fall we experience winter. If life is like nature, why would I have expected anything less than the occasional struggle? And in that struggle, why would I expect anything other than for it to soon pass?

When I first hurt my throat, I thought that was the end. I’d never be able to speak again, I’ll never make a difference, it was completely disempowering. But the truth is, it’s not our circumstances that are disempowering, it’s our mindsets. Every time we’re hit with obstacles and challenge, we focus immediately on the permanence of that problem.

It’s so easy for us to blow things out of proportion, to get lost in the story we tell ourselves, and to think that our entire life hinges on one thing we’ll barely remember 5-10 years later. That seemingly all-important thing could be anything causing you stress from a bad grade, getting into college, a relationship, divorce, even getting fired.

What matters is not trying to avoid the stress, or avoid the obstacles, what matters is how we perceive the struggle.  Can we really be that attached to comfort and constant progression that every regression and difficulty will knock us me course?

Well it shouldn’t, and it no longer does for me.

If you’re currently experiencing the summer, where everything is going right, and you’re feeling incredible mental health, congratulations! Keep it up and squeeze every last drop out of it. Just know…

Winter is coming

And guess what, when the winter comes and the stress follows, it’s okay, that too shall pass. If you never experienced the down’s of life, you wouldn’t be able to appreciate the ups.

Just ensure, that when the winter does come, you’re prepared.

The only practical approach is a proactive approach

The tools and strategies we need to use in order to move ourselves from right to left, from crisis to healthy on the mental health spectrum, are often well known. Therefore in order for us to ensure our mental health we need to focus on making common sense, common practice. Intentionality, or proactivity, is often the difference between health and crisis.

Below is a brief list of practices that can be used in order to be proactive about mental health and resiliency under stress:

  1. Exercise 3-4x per week (yoga, sports, weight training, cycling, running, martial arts, etc)
  2. Express yourself through your art (dance, painting, music, etc)
  3. Reduce or eliminate refined and processed foods
  4. Eat real foods, mostly plants, not too much 
  5. Practice Sleep hygiene and create a consistent sleep schedule  (7-9 hours of sleep a night)
  6. A daily practice of mindfulness – Gratitude journal, meditation, deep breathing, etc
  7. Having clear goals and priorities resulting in a sense of direction
  8. Develop relationships and communities that you can be open and transparent with your emotions
  9. Work with a psychologist, psychiatrist, or therapist, for professional support (if necessary)
  10. Have regular self-check in’s to determine where you stand on the mental health spectrum

This is by no means an exhaustive list. Everyone is an individual, and what works for one person will not necessarily work for the next. Now, I have highlighted numbers 1, 4, 5, and 7. This is intentional because they are the big levers you can pull in order to establish long-term and reliable mental health. 

When I’m slipping on the spectrum, or simply getting stressed, this is the first place I look. I’ll ask myself, am I moving enough? Am I eating and sleeping right? Are my goals giving me a clear sense of direction and clarity about my life? If any of those four are off, I’ll likely be moving in the wrong direction.

As an example, in 2011 when I experienced a crisis in my own mental health, none of these four levers were in place. I had quit all my sports and wasn’t exercising. I was craving and demanded sugar daily (multiple chocolate chip pancakes and a dozen chocolate granola bars, in fact). I stayed up past midnight for weeks and wondered why I couldn’t wake up in time for school. And I had no goals or sense of direction.

Furthermore, I spend a lot of time today thinking about and working with teen mental health through my public speaking. When parents come to me asking for advice for their teens, I virtually always start with these four levers. Are they exercising and how often? How much sugar do they consume and what does their overall diet look like? How many hours a night do they sleep and is it consistent? And finally, do they have a sense of direction? Do they have goals? Are they inspired?

This approach is not only extremely effective for working with teens, they can also be used effectively with individuals of all ages. What I hope you’re saying to yourself at this point is that this is all very common sense. Because, than you’d be right. If that’s the case, congratulations. Now it’s your responsibility to ensure that what is common sense to you, becomes a proactive common practice for you, your family, and your community.

I strongly believe that in the vast majority of cases, your mental health is in your hands. How you deal with stress, your philosophy on obstacles, setbacks, and roadblocks, and finally your daily habits, are at your control.

This is practical and rational.

And as much as mental health is an extremely sensitive topic, these are my beliefs. These are the beliefs that were developed out of necessity, through my own struggles with depression, anxiety, and crisis. My hope, is that they serve you as they have for me in sickness and in health.

Please share this with someone who needs it. One idea could be all they need to unlock a new mindset and point them in a new, empowering direction. The power of change is in your hands!

Mental health pic

Ps. If supporting mental health is important to you, I’m currently raising money for Canada’s largest youth led summit on mental health. We need your support! Please donate here or share this link with someone that would like to support mental health in Canada.

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change the destination of your life overnight but you can change the direction.”



Profile Of A Champion: Goals, The Mind, And Mastery Of Emotions

In my experience, goals, the mind, and emotions are like a three legged stool. If one leg is removed, the stool would inevitably fall. Without goals, we experience emotions of confusion, anxiety, and frustration. Without the right mindset, we see people without enough belief in themselves to even start or get close to accomplishing their goals. And last, without mastery over emotions, each obstacle, setback, and dip in the journey presents itself as an impossible challenge. Alas, it’s only through the presence of all three, their intimate and interdependent relationship, that allow the champion to live a life of achievement and fulfillment.

None more important than the others, when you see all three aligned with intention, the cumulative effects are powerful. It presents itself clearly in the way the champion shows up for life. It’s so obvious, that I had heard stories of this specific champion before I had even met her. I’d heard stories about her confidence, enthusiasm, and influence during Venture for Canada selection day. I was told that she dominated the challenges and unlike me, was unfazed by the tough questions and competition. Finally, in May of 2017, we met and I understood why.

Do you remember the last time you saw someone that walked with purpose? Who’s presence and energy was magnetic? Who, when you met them for the first time, your immediate impression was that they were different? I do. And when I met Sharita I knew I wanted to show up for life how she showed up. I knew I wanted to deconstruct what made her such a high performer so that you and I could do the same.

Sharitas headshot

Raised as a first generation Canadian, her parents, a Micro Biologist and a Chemist, helped Sharita cultivate a love for athletics and knowledge. Much the same as many of the champions I’ve come to know and admire, she is highly motivated and extremely competitive in all of her pursuits. A recent graduate from the Honours Environment and Business co-op program at the University of Waterloo, Sharita is a fellow with Venture for Canada, a dedicated pole dancer, has Shakespeare tattoos, and is crushing Sales at Georgette Packaging. Her unique philosophy on goal setting, and the mindset required to accomplish those goals, will prove incredibly useful on our continuous journey to embody the profile of a champion.


Goal setting for blog

Personally, I’ve never liked goals. In fact, I really resisted them up until the last 4 years. Even when I did try to write them down, it proved extremely challenging. Do you notice how heavy a pen feels when you try to write down your goals? Do you notice when we start writing how limited they get? I know I’m not alone. I never wrote down my goals for same reason most people don’t, because we know we aren’t going to keep our word.

The champion on the other hand, holds goals contextually in a completely different way! Sharita for one, has a personal philosophy on goal setting that I found inspiring. She believes,

“It’s okay to set impossible goals. But, every step to that goal has to be meticulously calculated and very real.”

All you need to do to know why it’s important to set goals is to observe someone who is up to something. Those like Sharita, who are out to achieve, have a different spark. They show up in life with a different demeanor about them. There’s something attractive about people who are intending to do something. Why? Because what you’re seeing is a human beings true self expression.

In one of my favourite posts everDr Maxwell Maltz demonstrated human beings are obviously like bicycles. If a bicycle isn’t headed towards something it loses it’s equilibrium and falls over. You and I are designed exactly like that emotionally! If we aren’t going towards something, if we have no goal, our life forces and energies are splintered and splattered. And it’s clear from the first eighteen years of my life, we cannot produce results like that.

When I met Sharita I could tell she was a goal setter. She sets goals because like me, and perhaps like you right now, she knows how it feels to be without a goal. In 2011, Sharita broke her shoulder playing soccer. Highly competitive and aggressive on the field, she fell battling for the ball with another player. With her arm stretched out, the other player landed on her shoulder shattering multiple bones. Ready to play varsity soccer in University, it was one of the first times Sharita was without a direction.

Can she be an athlete anymore? Should she continue to pursue science? Would she even go to University? Like many high school students today, she didn’t know what she wanted to do. Worse, she had no goal or direction motivating her to make a decision and move forward. It was one of the darkest and most mentally challenging times of her life.

I wish we could get all the high school students that are confused about their future to read this… There are consequences to having no direction! Remember, if we’re not moving towards something it’s easy for us to just fall right over. What shows up for those who have no goals is uncertainty, anxiety, confusion, and often times even depression. All these emotions are is a warning sign that we’re out of sync!

Why set goals like the champion? Because it is consistent with our nature. It’s consistent with the machinery of how we’re made as human beings. Not only does it garner your focus and energies to get things done, it compels us to reach out and achieve.

The Mind

The mind for the blog

On a biological level, the mind is extremely complex. On the other hand, on a practical level the mind is extremely simple. Further, the worlds most profound philosophical literature has preached the importance of positive thinking and the protection of our minds for thousands of years.

“Our life is what our thoughts make it.” – Marcus Aurelis

“Change your thoughts and you change your world.” – Norman Vincent Peale

“The more man meditates upon good thoughts, the better will be his world and the world at large.” – Confucius

To break it down, on a practical level, there are only two parts to the mind. The thinker and the prover. 

The thinker thinks.

The prover proves.

What does the prover prove? Simple, whatever the thinker thinks. Let’s explore two examples:

A) I can’t do it. That was my thought pattern for the first eighteen years of my life. With plenty of talent, work ethic, and ability, I lacked the belief in myself to think that I could win. Now, the proving part of my mind had to bring into my experience the actual events and criteria that say’s I’m right! You can’t do it… I manifested I can’t do it over and over and over again for eighteen years. I talked myself out of opportunities, I failed when I should have succeeded, and I gave up far too quickly on challenges where I should have persevered.

The thinker thinks and the prover proves.

B) I can do it. That was Sharita’s thought pattern her whole life. The thinker thinks, what must her prover prove? The prover must bring into her experience all of the events and criteria that say’s you’re right! You can do it… Sharita told me about a business pitch contest at Waterloo’s Social Incubator last year. Students had been working on business plans, financial projections, and scripts for months. With less than six hours before the start of the event she was asked to participate!

Most people including me would have backed off and said there wasn’t enough time to prepare. Sharita on the other hand didn’t question herself, the time, or if she had enough information. She read the description and immediately knew she could do it. In less than six hours, with one piece of paper and three powerpoint slides, Sharita pitched her idea with full confidence knowing that she had what it took to win. What do you think her prover did in those moments? Surprise, surprise, she showed up with conviction winning the entire competition and a fellowship with the Incubator.

The thinker thinks and the prover proves.

When you set a goal, and lay it on top of a foundation full of negative thoughts and self doubt, it’s a recipe for disaster. But, when you tackle your goals head on with the belief that you can do this. You deserve to be a winner. You were born to be a winner. And that you have all the confidence, all the skills, and all of the resources needed to accomplish your goals, your prover will bring into your life all of the experiences that are in exact agreement with the thinker.

Do not discount the simplicity of this process. The champion forces themselves to develop an empowering self-image. They force themselves to think positive thoughts. They understand what Marcus Aurelius said when he wrote that our life is what our thoughts make it. Think, and prove your way to embodying the champion.

Mastery of Emotions

emotions for the blog

From the moment we’re born, we’re fashioning our character out of our emotional responses to the world around us. I believe that emotions exist so that we can manipulate, dominate, and control everything in our experience. Think about this… When you were a baby, you’d cry and you’d get your mother or father’s response. You had a behaviour that elicited the response you wanted, so you continued that behaviour.

This is true for both the negative emotions we experienced in life as well as the positives. If we had a behaviour (public speaking, asking someone out, trying to make a joke, etc) that elicited an emotion or response we didn’t like, we cut off that behaviour all together. For the most part, this is done completely unconsciously. Therefore, for most people, they’ve unknowingly designed their life around the avoidance of the uncomfortable emotions they’ve decided are most uncomfortable for them. Sit with that for a second.

We have emotions that we’ve voted on to be so severe for us to experience that we have shaped our entire lives out of the avoidance of those emotions. Emotions like failure, undeserving, unlovable, not good enough. But the champion doesn’t do that. The champion understands that nobody attached meaning to those emotions except them. They’ve discovered that if you are unwilling to include those emotions and master their own response, they’re going to lose! There is no other reason on this planet that will make the average person lose other than their emotions.

I love Sharita’s story because she proved mastery over emotions at a very young age. When she was a teenager she played for the best soccer team in the Province. Her coach was well known for being disciplined and blunt. In fact, he was so harsh that many girls on their team would cry and quit after being given feedback on poor performance. Sharita recalls one terrible game specifically  where  her coach brought her aside after the game. He said that she could leave the team if she wanted to. That if she was going to stay she would need to step up and make a real contribution. He went on to say that her mediocre performance wasn’t going to cut it on that team.

This is where most people are slapped in the face with feelings of anger, disappointment, embarrassment and resentment. This is where most people quit. Sharita, however, displayed true mastery of her emotions. She immediately started practicing an extra three-five hours a day. She started going to camps where they taught high performance soccer skills. Unlike the runners up in life, when faced with difficult emotions instead of getting bitter, the champion decides to get better.

As you think about handling your emotions in your own life, remember that, just like you, Sharita had a choice. In those moments of adversity, challenge, and even disappointment, we get to decide the theme, or meaning that we attribute to the events in our lives. Nobody else get’s to decide the way you feel about what happens to you in life except for you. Don’t make yourself the victim of your own thinking. Rise up like the champion and attach new meaning to the emotions in life that make you feel uncomfortable.

Do This. 

  1. Write Down Your Goals– Ask yourself whether or not you have written down clearly defined goals for the second half of this year. If not, why not? Do you think you won’t keep your word? Are you afraid of success? Afraid of failure? Do you need an accountability partner to hold your ass to the fire? Whatever the reason, know that the excuses are only lies, do not rationalize. Take the evening to map out what you want and how you’re going to get there.
  2. Be honest about your thoughts- Because our thoughts are unconscious it’s challenging to pick up whether or not our thinker is helping to empower us. The easiest way to know is to check the fruit. If your thoughts are the seeds you’ve planted in your life, how are the results? Are you accomplishing the goals you set out to achieve? Did you lose that weight you wanted to? Did you hit that quota you set your sights on? Did you start that blog/business/video you wanted? Or have you procrastinated and made excuses as to why it’s a bad time to start. If the fruit is bad, there’s a good chance the seeds are bad too.
  3. Seek out discomfort- One of the quickest and most effective ways I’ve found to build mastery over emotions is to expose yourself to discomfort. My personal favourite are waking up early, taking ice cold showers every morning, and public speaking. Choose something small to start and slowly make your way to mastery over the emotions that make you feel uncomfortable.
  4. Re-read this post- Fundamentally, all of the other attributes of the champion, lay on top of your goals, the mind, and the mastery of your emotions. These three pillars are the foundation for your character and future success. Invest the time in yourself to understand where you have a weakness in one of these three areas and bring it up to par!

Leave a comment and let me know which of the three you’re going to start working on! I’m working with my accountability partner Ryan to have a clearer view of my goals and the steps and behaviours required to get them completed.

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change the destination of your life overnight, but you can change the direction.”



Profile Of A Champion: The Giver

Five months ago, I got kicked out of my Nona’s house. New to the city and now homeless, I didn’t have a clue of where to go next. At the time I was stressed, anxious, and pissed off at my grandparents. But looking back, I’d never change the tough love I experienced. The entire situation forced me to look critically at myself. A couple nights of huddling in the freezing cold, in the backseat of my 2000 Jetta, really helped me see my shortcomings!

In those moments, I realized that I had always been on the receiving end of my relationships. I defaulted into being a taker, asking for more than I’d given. I lived with my Nona for 6 months, rarely, if ever, contributing. I was focused on writing, reading, speaking, and volunteering outside of our home. And it was through this experience I learned that the taker never wins long term. It’s the honest giver who earns your trust, confidence and admiration. Givers earn your respect. It is they who are valued and who embody the champion. It became clear to me that if I was going to become a champion, I needed to develop a giving mentality.

Fortunately, there have been more champions in my life today than ever before! When I was at Venture for Canada training camp in May, I observed individual after individual that demonstrated this invaluable trait. The more champions I met, the more generosity, selflessness, and giving continued to show up as a theme in their character. One fellow in particular caught my attention. They went out of their way to compliment others, to share all of their best strategies and tools, and to made sure to contribute to the positive experience of every single fellow.

During the morning session of my third day, she sat in front of forty people, completely vulnerable, and shared her mind map. The map consisted of all her goals, ambitions, and plans for the year ahead. Meant for her eyes only, she shared the essence of who she was with a group she had met only a couple of days ago. As the map was passed around, eventually landing on my lap, I read one of the most profound mission statements I’d ever seen. It wrote,

“My purpose lies in living a life that creates social good, both personally and professionally. I will live a life that embodies generosity, kindness, strength and compassion. I prioritize balance and well-being. I will make time to discover the world. And I will seize every opportunity to learn and I will be present for those I love and who love me.”

I immediately knew she was the model I sought out. She was the missing link that could open me up to a world of giving and social good. Her name, is Lucia.

Lucia profile of a champion headshot

Lucia has been by far one of the most interesting people I’ve ever met. As her mission statement suggests, Lucia is engrossed in multiple ventures to help leave a positive impact in this world. One, accessible to support by the public, is an initiative to build libraries in needy schools and communities throughout her home country, Honduras. This year she is hoping to launch two more ventures, one to promote gender parity in STREAM fields through play, and one to champion innovation in emerging markets. On top of that, she wakes up between 4:30 and 5am everyday, is Trilingual, and is working on her first belt in Krav Maga (I wouldn’t mess with her if I was you). During the day, she works full-time as the Marketing Coordinator for the National Angel Capital Organization.

If that wasn’t impressive enough, the more I get to know her, the more I realize that she embodies all eight of the qualities making up the profile of a champion. And because of that she’s paved a path for what it means to be a giver. If we model that path, we too can live a life of abundance and fulfillment.

Now, before you can live that life, it’s important to know what to avoid. Let me help you with that.

The Taker

The taker

Both Lucia and Adam Grant, Author of “Give and Take“, would characterize the behaviour while living at my Nona’s as that of a taker. The taker views interactions as a way of extracting value from other people. They approach people with the mindset of, “How can  get as much as possible from this exchange?” They tend to believe that by taking, it’s the shortest and most direct path to achieving their own goals.

Admittedly, and unfortunately, that was true for me. I was too frugal to contribute in rent. And even if I couldn’t afford to pitch in with money, I didn’t try to help out in other ways. I took advantage of the food in the house instead of helping out with the groceries or cooking for my grandparents. I didn’t care for the house or try to help maintain it. I didn’t clean up after myself enough. I didn’t even contribute to the laundry…

Looking back, I recognize my selfishness. I’m surprised they didn’t kick me out sooner! And I’m lucky that’s all that happened. If you’re a taker, more often than not, you’ll burn bridges in your relationships and start to be known as someone who is selfish, narcissistic, and cancerous to teams. So let me be clear, the taker never wins long term. They may get lucky and avoid being noticed at first, but in the long run, they will be exposed and lose.

While most people will never be exclusively  givers or takers, the champion is, by and large, a giver. So if you recognize yourself in the description of the taker and want to work towards becoming a champion as I do, it’s time to audit your behaviour and at least be a matcher.

The Matcher

The matcher

If you’re thinking I’m being pretty hard on myself, I am. It’s by being critical of my behaviour that I’ve been able to transition to being at least a matcher. In most of our interactions, our instinct is to maintain and even balance of give-and take in life. We try to keep fairness and a sense of quid pro quo in our dealings with others. If we do someone a favour, we virtually always expect an equal one in return.

This is where I see myself today. As a salesman, one of my favourite books is Robert Cialdini’s, “Influence“. In that book, the first rule of influence is reciprocity. Robert shares that in society, we’ve grown up in a culture where I’m obligated to give back to you the same form of behaviour that you give to me. For example, if you invite me to one of your parties, I should invite you to one of mine. If you remember my birthday with a gift, I should bring one to yours. And if you do me a favour, I owe you a favour.

I loved that concept! It’s better than a taker right? Well, it turns out, only slightly. After diving into purpose, giving, and what it means to be generous with Lucia, I found out the huge difference intention makes in the giving process. When writing Ryan Cobb‘s post on doing more than expected, Lucia was literally the first one to message me privately and give me feedback for where I stumbled in his write up.

Much like Lucia, Ryan isn’t a matcher, he’s a giver. He doesn’t approach situations knowing that by doing and giving more than expected, he’ll in turn, get more because of reciprocity. No. Both Ryan and Lucia’s intentions when giving, are to give. End of story. It’s not about economics, it’s not about reciprocation, it’s about doing the right thing and how it makes them feel to be a giver. Lucia shared that,

“As soon as you start adding, ‘what am I getting out of this?’ your giving becomes disingenuous. You need to be willing to put others before yourself. The whole point of being a generous human being is that it comes from a place of helping others. Selflessness is key.”

Matchers, as Lucia pointed out, aren’t being generous. Further, in my experience with matching, I’ve even been seen as manipulative or that I was only doing a favour because I expected one in return. I don’t want to come from that place anymore. Do you? As a matcher, I do understand that I’m making better decisions than when I was a taker. But, I know I have the capacity to do better. Generosity is about intentions. I want to challenge you, as I have myself, that if your intentions are to take, or to give solely because we expect reciprocity, it’s time to start modelling a giver, immediately.

The Giver

Lucia Profile of a champion Screenshot

Every week on my Facebook wall I can expect to see this post by Lucia. Selflessly, she opens up her time, energy, and resources, to contribute to lives of her community in one way or another. Just as Adam Grant describes, the champion comes into an interaction trying to figure out, “What can I contribute here? How Can I add value here?” The champion is looking for ways to be helpful, without strings attached. 

Now that it’s clear what the giver looks like, there’s only one final question to ask: why is the champion a giver, rather than a matcher or taker?

As discussed, the taker will lose long term. Wether that is due to poor relationships or reputation, they aren’t able to build enough trust to open them up for opportunity in the future.

The matcher, although better, can still be perceived as having dishonourable intentions. On top of that, you will always have to give a matcher more if you want to receive more. Not only does this have diminishing returns, the matcher is less likely to take on a leadership role in tough times. When the situation has less to give, so does the matcher.

The giver however, should be our default mode. Have you ever wondered how you could feel more passion and zest for life? The answer is help other people. I’m a huge Tony Robbins fan. He’s famous for saying that one, of the only two paths to fulfillment, is through contribution.

The givers and the champions in your life find more meaning and purpose in their work and experience because they’re contributing. They know that what they do daily, truly makes a difference. They make it clear that their colleagues, friends, and family are really important to them, and as a result, they end up building many and deep relationships with people who often become sources of creative ideas and open doors to new opportunities.

According to Lucia, givers can look forward to more opportunities, responsibility, and respect. Over time, the more she gives, the more her professional results are dramatically amplified. Her coworkers and friends recognize this character trait, and know that if given a task or added responsibility, she will be generous with the effort she puts in. That is what builds her reputation. The possibilities for someone who is a problem solver, resourceful, and giving are endless.

She warns however that as much as it’s important to come from a place of selflessness, it’s equally important to be generous with one’s self.  Avoid becoming a doormat. Lucia stressed to me that being a giver is not always easy. It’s easy to take a beating because some people will take advantage of you. So remember, just like on an airplane, we need to put our own oxygen mask on first, to make sure we can support and give to those around us. In the end, the quality and quantity of what we give is improved when it’s coming from a happier, balanced, and nurtured place.

I don’t know about you, but I want endless possibilities. I want more respect, trust, and deeper relationships in my life. I want to be a giver. Fortunately for me, and for anyone on the path to becoming a champion, we have examples like Lucia, Ryan, and others we can turn to and model.

Do This. 

  1. Learn from Lucia- Lucia’s Facebook post is only one of many examples of how she gives. One of the most humble people I know, Lucia described all of her initiatives to give as simply part of her values and purpose. She want’s to show others that there is more than one way to give. Today, she’s engaged in two socially conscious businesses. Volunteers with many charitable organizations and with her local MP. She contributes to building homes and even though she’s always wanted a tattoo, she’s never gone through with it because it would interrupt her blood donation schedule! The key is that Lucia is intentional with her giving. She regularly schedules time out of her busy life (trust me, I thought I was busy) to make a contribution. I personally plan on spending more time volunteering, how about you?
  2. Focus on the little things- If you can’t do that she said, simply focus on the small things you can do every single day. Where can you be more generous at work? With your family? With your friends? Can you hold doors? Share an insight of something you recently learned? Make an introduction? There are unlimited ways to be generous. Unlike the taker, Lucia says that the giver asks themselves daily, “Am I making the world better, yes or no?” “Am I making this persons life better, yes or no?” If you can’t go big, start small. You’ll feel so good, that small wins will grow into big ones over time!
  3. Start Now– Let’s go on this journey of giving together. Lucia has been generous even to provide her email for anyone that has further questions about generosity or her story ( Take her up on the offer because she’s the type of champion you want in your life!

Our families deserve our contribution. Our work deserves our contribution. Our Country deserves our contribution. And most importantly, we deserve the feelings of fulfillment and joy that will inevitably follow us on our path to endless possibilities!

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “you cannot change the destination of your life overnight, but you can change your direction”



Default Mode: AGGRESSIVE

Red faced. Short breathed. Hot-tempered. 

Yosmity short tempered

If those are the images you get when you see the word aggressive, I’d like to challenge your thinking. When I think of being aggressive in my own life I think about taking action. I think of the words attack, offence and industry. Being aggressive is the counter to how most people live their lives. If you want to stand out, build confidence and crush depression or anxiety,  do the opposite of the masses, make your default mode AGGRESSIVE.

Last week I met a group of new friends out in Kingston at Venture for Canada training camp. I knew I made the right first impression when Shannon, a Social Anthropology Major, asked me if I had always been so intense. I knew immediately that I hadn’t. I knew that for years I was defensive and passive and as a result, timid, lacking in self confidence and depressed. Her question reminded me immediately of one of my favourite quotes by Montaigne,

“My life has been filled with terrible misfortune; most of which never happened.”

Can you relate?

When I was depressed and defensive, I was always in my head. I always pictured the worst thing that could happen. I never took action on any of my ideas or inspiration. I would postpone doing things until I proved to myself I shouldn’t or couldn’t or until it was too late to even try. I learned first hand that being default defensive is the most disempowering state you can live in. When Shannon asked me that question, “have you always been so intense?” I felt tremendous pride and burning desire to share with you how to be aggressive and get the action habit. 

Aggressive VS Defensive

Successful people are aggressive. They’re on the offence. Virtually all unsuccessful people are defensive. They’re passive. Mr. Aggressive is a doer. He takes action, gets things done, follows through on ideas and plans. Mr Defensive is a “don’ter“. Like me at 16, he waits, contemplates, postpones action until he has 100% of the information he needs.

The difference shows up in little ways. Mr Aggressive plans a vacation. He takes it. Mr. Defensive plans a vacation. But, he postpones it until “next” year. Mr Aggressive decides he needs to take his health seriously. He hires a trainer and starts meal prepping. Mr Defensive decides he needs to take his health seriously. But, this weekend is his Uncle Bobs birthday party. He chooses to wait until Monday and than proceeds to never get started. Mr Aggressive read that he should pay himself 10% of his income before spending anything on expenses. He calls the bank and sets up an automatic withdrawal where 10% of his income goes directly into his investment account. Under the same circumstances, Mr Defensive finds a good reason to put of calling the bank and the withdrawal is never set up.

The difference shows up in big things too. Mr Aggressive wants to go into business for himself. He does. Mr Defensive also wants to go into business for himself, but he discovers just in time a “good” reasons as to why he better not. Mr Aggressive knows he deserves a raise. He asks for it. Mr. Defensive also knows he deserves a raise, but after imagining all the worst case scenarios of brining it up with his boss he does not.

The differences in these examples are profound and they happen everyday. Think about two people you know that embody these two opposite personalities. 

Everyday the Mr or Ms Aggressive in your life is getting the things they want done, done. As a by-product, they’re gaining confidence, a feeling of inner security, self-reliance, and more income. On the flip side, everyday the Ms or Mr Defensive in your life is not getting the things they want done, done. As a by-product of not acting, they’re losing confidence in themselves, destroying their self-reliance, and are living in mediocrity.

As you reflect on those people in your life, take an inventory of your own personality. Are you in a natural state of being aggressive, doing, and taking action? Or, are you normally defensive, passive, and waiting for the perfect moment to act? If you relate more to the latter, write down this quote by Chazz Palminteri,

“The saddest thing in life is wasted talent and the choices you make will shape you forever.”

I’m writing a book right now titled, “Squandering Talent”. It’s a reminder to myself as well as a warning to others on how to prevent wasting your innate potential. Talent itself is not enough! Talent is only valuable when it is cultivated, expressed, and aggressively acted upon. Allow future regret, of wasting your talent by being defensive, drive you.

Someone once said that the saddest words of tongue or pen are these: it might have been or I should have. 

Avoid regret by being aggressive. Being aggressive is as simple as getting the action habit. With all circumstances the same, the only advantage Mr Aggressive has over Mr Defensive is that he takes action now. Now is the magic word of success. Tomorrow, next week, later, sometime, someday, are all more often than not simply synonyms for the failure word, never.

Do This. 

We should make new years resolutions if we’re reading this post on January 1st. But, if we’re reading this on June 22nd, than we should make June 22nd resolutions. Waiting for the calendar to flip for us to start making our life better is ridiculous. Whenever you’re reading this, resolve to do better today.

Resolve to stop thinking about it. Stop dreaming about it. Stop researching every aspect of it. Stop debating all the pros and cons of it. Be aggressive and just start doing it. 

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change the destination of your life overnight, but you can change your direction.”.




Be. Do. Have.

One of the biggest frustrations in life is looking for an above average job, with above average pay, without becoming an above average person!” – Jim Rohn

One of the biggest challenges we’ll face on our own unique journey of achievement is focusing on the wrong things. Over time we’ve developed an unhealthy focus on having. Having things, having money, having the end result. Think about it… Yesterday when you scrolled through social media, weren’t you constantly inundated with peoples supposed success stories? Whether it’s real or fake, on Instagram and Facebook we see young people with fancy watches, nice cars, money, beautiful bodies etc… Dramatically more often than not, this success is fake. Whether it’s rented cars or borrowed money, plastic surgery, or filters on pictures, it’s often a facade.

Even when the success is genuine, and those same people worked their asses off to achieve what they wanted, it still proposes a problem. When you and I look up to those examples we get obsessed with the end result, we get obsessed with the having. We have a hard time separating the end results with the two dramatically more important focuses of the success equation, being and doing.

When I look at the real achievers in my life, it’s almost never about having. It’s about the journey. When I look at real achievers their success equation looks like this:

  1. Be or becoming
  2. Do or doing

Their equation focuses on the journey and the process of becoming the type of person that would deserve the type of success they desire.

Gary vee for blog

Gary Vaynerchuk is the perfect example of be, do have. For anyone that follows Gary, you know focuses on the 2 most important parts of that success equation, the being and the doing.

First, he focuses on who he is being: what should his self-talk sound like? What should his personal philosophy be? How should he treat other people?  These are in the realm of who he is. Gary is patient, Gary is a hard worker, Gary always provides more value than he takes, Gary has long term goals, Gary is charismatic, Gary is resilient. Here’s a great question to ask yourself: Who are you becoming? Who do you want to be? What character traits do you want to embody? Start there. Ask yourself those questions, and then come with me to the doing.

Second, by becoming that person, he was then able to venture out into the realm of doing. Imagine Gary wasn’t patient. In 2007 he would have started his Youtube show, and quit after 10 episodes. Nobody watched his videos for over 2 years. But by focusing on who he was, which was patient, he was able to create over 1000 videos and ultimately had incredible success. This is where I needed to check my own thinking… In order for us to do what a successful person would do, we need to become a successful person in our minds first. We need to think like an achiever or, here’s the blunt truth, we’ll never commit, stay persistent, or learn the skills we need to justify the having. Now that you’ve committed to being that person you want to become, here’s some other great questions to ask yourself: what time would that person wake up? What type of goals would that person have? What type of books would that person read? What type of foods would that person eat? What do you need to do day in and day out to justify having what you want?

First, embody the person we want to become. Do the things that person would do. And finally, by taking those actions, you can justify having what you desire.

Is that you today? Because for the majority of my life I had that equation backwards. One of my good friends Happie asked me yesterday if I’d always been such a good listener. His compliment gave me an opportunity to reflect. My answer was NO! My family used to tell me over and over that I sucked at listening and that they felt I never cared what they had to say. I told him that I had to consciously focus on becoming a person who was intensely interested in other people (being). Because of that focus I read all the books on communication, body language and interacting with people I could find (doing). As a result of becoming an above average person, committed to learning new skills, today I’m known as a great listener (my girlfriend may argue with me on this one)….

And for the majority of people looking for an above average paying job, or to grow a profitable business, they also have this equation backwards. If you were like me, or like most people, they’re looking to have the having, without becoming. Without becoming, you’ll never have the skills or character needed to do the doing long enough to deserve what it is you want to have! We’ve got it backwards!

Do This.

Check your thinking. Do you focus on becoming better? Or, do you focus on wanting more?

If you’re honest with yourself, and your answer is: I’m focused on wanting more… Today is a great day to change the direction of that focus. 

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change he destination of your life overnight, but you can change your direction.



Practicality of Positive Thinking

Courtesy of my favourite Google Chrome Plug In  Momentum, every morning I open my laptop, I’m presented with an inspirational picture and quote.

Blog picture- thinker prover

How appropriate that as I sat down this morning to write about the mind, our thoughts and ultimately how they dictate the success or failure of every facet of our life, Momentum gave me this quote,

“Don’t think about what might go wrong, think about what could be right.”

How true! But it’s not enough to understand this concept on a surface level. For you and I to take our health, wealth, relationships, or impact on this world to the next level we need internalize this as part of our belief system. Fundamentally, positive thinking is extremely practical. And while the mind and brain are extremely complex, my mentor George Zalucki broke it down for me so that it is simple to explain. He said the mind is made up of two parts, the thinker and the prover.

The thinker thinks. 

The prover proves. 

What does the prover prove? Simple, whatever the thinker thinks! This is why positive thinking is so fucking practical! Let’s explore two examples:

A) I can’t do it. That is my thought. Now, the proving part of my mind must bring into my experience the actual events and criteria that say’s, you’re right! You can’t do it…

The thinker thinks and the prover proves.

B) I can do it. That is my thought. The thinker thinks, what must the prover prove? The prover must bring into my experience all of the events and criteria that say’s, you’re right! You can do it…

The thinker thinks and the prover proves.

Simple right? Here’s where it becomes a challenge, most of our thoughts are unconscious. That means that 95% of my life is run by my subconscious programming! When I started to take a more positive direction in my life, I had to become conscious of every thought coming from my thinker!

What do you think my prover said to me through 18 years of thinking: I’m not good enough, I’m not smart enough, I’m not good looking enough, your voice is too feminine, your nose isn’t symmetrical, you can’t be a public speaker, I’ll always be a runner up, there’s no point of living? You guessed it… It said, you’re right! 

When I started to consciously think more positive thoughts, my life change was dramatic. For example, at 18 my parents forced me to start working with them on their business. Forced WAY out of my comfort zone, I was asked to speak in public, to sell and share the companies story. If I let my subconscious do the thinking for me… My prover would have slapped me in the face with massive failure.

Instead, I thought, I can do this, I deserve this, I’m confident, I have what it takes, I know the information, I will be charming and charismatic and they will love me. Guess what happened? Surprise, surprise, my prover brought into my life all of the experiences that were in exact agreement with the thinker.

I started to gain momentum. My self-esteem sky rocketed. I was asked to speak more and more. Eventually, my subconscious thoughts became empowering and self-serving. I’ll be forever grateful for those months and years of consciously focusing on positive thoughts.

“Thinking about what could go right changed my life.”

Do this: Choose two new empowering thoughts that you will repeat consciously. When something outside your comfort zone presents itself, remember those thoughts. Repeat them to yourself. Yell out loud, I CAN do it! And like magic, you’ll gain the strength you need, like I have, to overcome all obstacles.

Till next time, stay on the offensive. Aggressively purse a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change the destination of your life overnight, but you can change your direction”.