Did you know…
92% of the 17 million people that try to quit smoking each year fail.
95% of people who lose weight fail to keep it off long term.
88% of people who set New Year’s resolutions fail at their attempt.
Why is the world full of well intentioned people trying to make positive change, yet so many fail? Why do you hold yourself back from positive change?
It’s an important question that I’ve been asking myself in 2017 more than ever. For example, I’ve been telling myself I would start blogging about my mental health journey for two years. Yet, I only started a few months ago. I’ve been telling myself for the last year that I would also make videos. I know I’m a strong communicator, I know I have talent and I also know that if I I could get myself to blog, I can get myself to make videos!
Whether you want to lose weight, quit smoking, ask your cute neighbour on a date, or if you’re just like me and you want to make videos, we all need to find out what I like to call our tipping point.
Before that however, we need to understand that a fundamental level, there are two forces that motivate us to do what we do: the desire to avoid pain or the desire to gain pleasure. Taking action and making a change isn’t a matter of ability, it’s a matter of motivation. When change is a should, most people won’t make the change. If change is a must, it’s another story! The tipping point makes taking action a must.
The tipping point is a strategy I’ve used successfully in the past. I’ve used it to overcome some of my biggest roadblocks in creating change. When I wanted to start waking up at 5am, I used the tipping point. When I wanted to speak in public for the first time, I used the tipping point. And, just like when I finally decided to write my first blog, I’m going to use the tipping point to take action on my first videos.
“Simply put, our tipping point can be described as the moment in time when we associated more pain to inaction than we do to action. “
I want you to imagine an unbalanced scale. If you’re like most people (often including me), your scale is either completely level or tipped in the direction of your fears and excuses. Meaning we can’t take action! If our desire to make a positive change is overpowered by your fears of taking action, we will not change. In this visual, we’ve found the tipping point, only in the wrong direction. In other words,
“Until our perceived fear of taking action is outweighed by the pain of not taking action, we won’t change.”
Have you noticed the whole world is full of people who’s fears are bigger than their desire to take action? Have you noticed that all of the movers, shakers, and people we look up to in this world decided that the pleasure of creating a legacy and making an impact far out weighted all of their concerns and excuses?
In order to access the tipping point, we need to associate massive PAIN to not changing NOW, and massive PLEASURE to changing immediate. The motivation is based on both pain AND pleasure. Pain is short-term motivation, but you need the pleasure for long term change.
Do This (If you’re not going to participate, close the window now because you’re wasting your time).
*I’ve used the following questions about making videos to help unlock my tipping point. Take the time to ask yourself the same for whatever you want to change!
- What will not changing cost cost me?
- What has not changing cost me in the past?
- What is not changing costing the people you love?
- What is it costing you in (money, work, family etc)?
Questions that identify inconsistency
- How does not changing keep you from being close with your friends and family?
- Should people follow a leader that doesn’t have the discipline to make the change you’re trying to make?
- How can you tell yourself that it’s okay to not make the change even though you think about it everyday?
- If you change this now, how will your life be?
- What will you gain?
- What will it mean for the people you love?
- What will it give you?
Final thoughts… The tipping point will only happen when you’re emotionally associated to the massive, immediate pain of not changing, and the massive immediate pleasure of changing now. If you find the questions helpful in making that change, share them with someone you think it can help!
Till next time, stay on the offense. Aggressively pursue a better version of yourself. And remember what Jim Rohn said, “You cannot change the destination of your life overnight, but you can change your direction”.